Mindfulness - How it can help you cope with the Daily Challenges you face and Transform your way of Thinking
"I started learning about Mindfulness from a place of fear, I didn't really understand what it meant for me in my life in the beginning but by the end of the course and putting it into my daily routine I instantly felt better."
We all struggle with the unknown, we are constantly either jumping into the future or revisiting the past without really just focusing on what we can do in the present moment we're in.
We skip it as our minds are completely focused on the 'What If's' and worst case scenarios (catastrophizing) rather than how to just solve the problem as it stands at the moment or just being aware of what we are feeling now in the moment and allowing ourselves to sit with it, identify the emotion, feel it through our bodies and then just allowing ourselves to let it go without any judgement.
Our minds are amazing creators and story tellers, but it seems that the mind wants to focus on the negative or create a drama that hasn't actually happened and we are our own worst enemies as we constantly judge every little thing we've done without acknowledging the little achievements and positives.
This isn't your fault, it's what your mind is programmed to do and it can be difficult to change that mindset but once you do, you'll feel so much better and will be able to handle things from a place of love and compassion rather than fear and guilt.
"Mindfulness takes away that negative mindset, it teaches you to think more positively and allow you to take control of your mind before its bolting out of the stable and running rampant."
What is Mindfulness?
Mindfulness is allowing yourself to think differently and more positively, with no judgement towards yourself (or others), being aware of your emotions and feelings and living in the present moment rather than constantly visiting the past or jumping into the future.
It also helps you recognise how you emotionally and mentally react to different, stressful situations and how to create a way to cope with these difficulties when they arise.
A Mindful mind set can help you to pin point triggers for Meltdowns, manage your anxiety and depression in a loving and compassionate way and allow you to move forward and grow into the person you want to be.
Mindfulness is your choice, you are in control and believe it or not it will teach you how to gain control without your mind getting in the way or taking over.
It can give you the emotional freedom and stop you from being overwhelmed and overloaded without the need to analyse constantly looking for unknown answers as to why you feel the way you do in that present moment, instead it gives you the freedom to sit with the emotion, identify it and accept it before you just let it go.
Why did I choose Mindfulness?
I choose Mindfulness as a way to add to my tool kit of coping strategies and even though in the beginning I didn't want to do it, I found as I was practising and learning more about it I felt more in control of my own mind and Mental Health.
Since the beginning of the year I have been struggling, I've been bogged down with negativity and been drawn to outside negative influences.
With the whole Covid-19 situation I was constantly and actively engrossed in the news, I was terrified and thinking constantly about the What If, getting angry at posts and articles being written in the news knowing that I had no control and influence on it but still wanting to have some form of control or influence in a situation that was completely not my responsibility.
"Mindfulness has taught me that it's okay to feel scared and frightened, it's okay to not understand and it's okay to feel like you're not in control."
It has instilled boundaries that come from a place of love and compassion for my own emotional and others emotional wellbeing.
The first thing I did was I literally culled my private Facebook page of Negative Influences - news sites where unfollowed (I have one paper on my Facebook and that is my local paper), I muted people who were upsetting me without actually having to tell them or justify to them that I had done it. I didn't have to explain or justify my actions because there was a clear boundary that said:
"I respect your opinions but I need to put my own mental health and wellbeing first."
"Mindfulness has allowed me to take back control without thinking about it, it just happened automatically."
Things that used to scare me became easier to deal with, this included Meltdowns:
It seems utterly impossible and slightly ridiculous to be mindful in a meltdown but it can be done.
Meltdowns by their nature are a last resort to release bottled up emotions, stress, anxieties and whatever else has happened to us to cause it to happen. They are when our brain literally can not take any more information and we just let go in the most explosive way possible and we don't think, in fact we go into a Mindless state. Meltdowns are volatile and they are distressing for everyone involved and they are very exhausting and take a while to recover from.
Instead of letting my mind run off and exacerbate my Meltdown further, I just sat in it, I recognised it, accepted the meltdown with no judgement and I breathed through it before letting it go.
I literally laid on my bed with my headphones in and listened to music that was peaceful (rather than my old sad and angry playlist that just fuels my depression and anxiety), I focused on how my body felt and just allowed it to wash over me (it was more like crashing continuously over and over again) whilst breathing.
I didn't allow myself to get stuck in that feeling and when I was ready I let it go.
Yes I still screamed, I sobbed, I spoke to my counsellor on the phone and I did feel utterly awful afterwards but I came out of it faster because I realised what was happening and knew what to do at the time.
It felt liberating, the meltdown wasn't long in it's duration and I actually knew that I wasn't going to fly off the handle and start to become more destructive or fall into more harmful behaviours.
"Mindfulness has also helped me to pin point when I feel like I'm going to slip into a meltdown, I now know the warning signs better than I have done since my diagnosis at the age of 16."
I recognise when I begin to feel 'wobbly', where everything becomes to much to process and even though I'm not able to verbalise what I'm feeling or thinking (because the thoughts just go round your head at 1000 mile per hour) I instinctively was thinking:
"Hang on a minute, just stop and re-centre yourself, sit in the moment.... what are you actually feeling right now?"
You don't need to know why, it's just what are you feeling in the present moment and being aware of it.
When this happens, you literally begin to focus on what you are feeling, you don't even need to know the emotion or identify it (it can help to pin point the emotion but you don't have to and don't feel/put any type of pressure to identify it) and just go with it.
Don't overthink or start allowing your mind to create a well crafted and elaborate story, just sit with the emotion (or meltdown itself) and say to yourself, for example:
"I feel Wobbly."
or
"This is how it feels to be wobbly."
Focus on your breathing, trying to keep a steady rhythm breathing deeply in and out and just accept that you feel that way, you're aware of it and don't judge yourself and when you're ready you can let it go.
It will take a few tries a bit of practice but it does work if you stick with it.
How to Let Go:
A butterfly visiting my garden
This is something I learnt whilst doing my course is how to visualise thoughts and emotions in a really beautiful and simplistic way.
You can choose how you personally visualise your thoughts and emotions, they can be:
- A shape
- A colour
- A Animal of your choice
I choose at the moment to visualise my emotions and thoughts as butterfly that is fluttering through my mind and body. It is constantly moving and trying to land but it can't as it is still flying between the past and the future.
When you practice Mindfulness it can help to be able to visualise, when you are bringing in the awareness sitting with the emotions and thoughts try to think of what they look like to you personally.
When I'm trying to bring myself into the present moment, I try and visualise that butterfly that is constantly fluttering from the past and into the present.
Focusing on my breathing, I imagine a net and begin to catch the butterfly in it, once i've caught it, I hold it in my hands and let it rest there, I take in it's beautiful colours and patterns and admire it. I let it rest for as long as it wants and when I'm ready to release it, I just visualise opening the palm of my hands up towards the sky and I watch it fly off and let it go without judgement.
It's so simple and so pure but it works.
You can imagine your emotions and thoughts in whatever way you like and tailor it to suit you.
How can Mindfulness help me?
Mindfulness is simple and easy to do once you have the intention to make the changes to the way you see and view yourself and the world around you.
Mindfulness applies a mixture of Key exercises and Skills that you can add to your tool box and coping strategies.
Here are some of the key Mindful exercises and skills :
- Meditations - you can find a meditation that suits you best without any pressure
- Breathing exercises to help you focus and centre yourself
- Exercises to re-centre and focus yourself so that you can deal with difficult life challenges that you can do anywhere
- Learning to manage your everyday life in a calm, compassionate, loving and accepting manner, without the fear of change, becoming more flexible
- Learning to listen to yourself and others and build stronger communication with compassion and love.
Mindfulness will help you to understand yourself without feeling guilty, anxious, stressed, frustrated or depressed.
You can do it when you want you choose to, in your own time and without any time restraints or pressure.
It is a great way to focus your mind and body, reconnecting and treating yourself with compassion and Love. 
If you feel like you would like to learn more about Mindfulness or want to take part every Monday there is a new feature called: Mindful Monday
Over on the Aspergers Girl Guide Facebook Page, where every week there will be a new feature focusing specifically on different element of Mindfulness and how it can help you cope with the daily challenges you face and help you understand yourself in a loving and compassionate way.
I will also being doing posts on the blog as well to go more in depth about how Mindfulness can help you and talking about how it has helped me so far.
www.facebook.com/AspergersGirls
I hope to see you soon!
Sophie x
Mindfulness is allowing yourself to think differently and more positively, with no judgement towards yourself (or others), being aware of your emotions and feelings and living in the present moment rather than constantly visiting the past or jumping into the future.
It also helps you recognise how you emotionally and mentally react to different, stressful situations and how to create a way to cope with these difficulties when they arise.
A Mindful mind set can help you to pin point triggers for Meltdowns, manage your anxiety and depression in a loving and compassionate way and allow you to move forward and grow into the person you want to be.
Mindfulness is your choice, you are in control and believe it or not it will teach you how to gain control without your mind getting in the way or taking over.
It can give you the emotional freedom and stop you from being overwhelmed and overloaded without the need to analyse constantly looking for unknown answers as to why you feel the way you do in that present moment, instead it gives you the freedom to sit with the emotion, identify it and accept it before you just let it go.
Why did I choose Mindfulness?
I choose Mindfulness as a way to add to my tool kit of coping strategies and even though in the beginning I didn't want to do it, I found as I was practising and learning more about it I felt more in control of my own mind and Mental Health.
Since the beginning of the year I have been struggling, I've been bogged down with negativity and been drawn to outside negative influences.
With the whole Covid-19 situation I was constantly and actively engrossed in the news, I was terrified and thinking constantly about the What If, getting angry at posts and articles being written in the news knowing that I had no control and influence on it but still wanting to have some form of control or influence in a situation that was completely not my responsibility.
"Mindfulness has taught me that it's okay to feel scared and frightened, it's okay to not understand and it's okay to feel like you're not in control."
It has instilled boundaries that come from a place of love and compassion for my own emotional and others emotional wellbeing.
The first thing I did was I literally culled my private Facebook page of Negative Influences - news sites where unfollowed (I have one paper on my Facebook and that is my local paper), I muted people who were upsetting me without actually having to tell them or justify to them that I had done it. I didn't have to explain or justify my actions because there was a clear boundary that said:
"I respect your opinions but I need to put my own mental health and wellbeing first."
"Mindfulness has allowed me to take back control without thinking about it, it just happened automatically."
Things that used to scare me became easier to deal with, this included Meltdowns:
It seems utterly impossible and slightly ridiculous to be mindful in a meltdown but it can be done.
Meltdowns by their nature are a last resort to release bottled up emotions, stress, anxieties and whatever else has happened to us to cause it to happen. They are when our brain literally can not take any more information and we just let go in the most explosive way possible and we don't think, in fact we go into a Mindless state. Meltdowns are volatile and they are distressing for everyone involved and they are very exhausting and take a while to recover from.
Instead of letting my mind run off and exacerbate my Meltdown further, I just sat in it, I recognised it, accepted the meltdown with no judgement and I breathed through it before letting it go.
I literally laid on my bed with my headphones in and listened to music that was peaceful (rather than my old sad and angry playlist that just fuels my depression and anxiety), I focused on how my body felt and just allowed it to wash over me (it was more like crashing continuously over and over again) whilst breathing.
I didn't allow myself to get stuck in that feeling and when I was ready I let it go.
Yes I still screamed, I sobbed, I spoke to my counsellor on the phone and I did feel utterly awful afterwards but I came out of it faster because I realised what was happening and knew what to do at the time.
It felt liberating, the meltdown wasn't long in it's duration and I actually knew that I wasn't going to fly off the handle and start to become more destructive or fall into more harmful behaviours.
"Mindfulness has also helped me to pin point when I feel like I'm going to slip into a meltdown, I now know the warning signs better than I have done since my diagnosis at the age of 16."
I recognise when I begin to feel 'wobbly', where everything becomes to much to process and even though I'm not able to verbalise what I'm feeling or thinking (because the thoughts just go round your head at 1000 mile per hour) I instinctively was thinking:
"Hang on a minute, just stop and re-centre yourself, sit in the moment.... what are you actually feeling right now?"
You don't need to know why, it's just what are you feeling in the present moment and being aware of it.
When this happens, you literally begin to focus on what you are feeling, you don't even need to know the emotion or identify it (it can help to pin point the emotion but you don't have to and don't feel/put any type of pressure to identify it) and just go with it.
Don't overthink or start allowing your mind to create a well crafted and elaborate story, just sit with the emotion (or meltdown itself) and say to yourself, for example:
"I feel Wobbly."
or
"This is how it feels to be wobbly."
Focus on your breathing, trying to keep a steady rhythm breathing deeply in and out and just accept that you feel that way, you're aware of it and don't judge yourself and when you're ready you can let it go.
It will take a few tries a bit of practice but it does work if you stick with it.
How to Let Go:
 |
| A butterfly visiting my garden |
This is something I learnt whilst doing my course is how to visualise thoughts and emotions in a really beautiful and simplistic way.
You can choose how you personally visualise your thoughts and emotions, they can be:
- A shape
- A colour
- A Animal of your choice
When you practice Mindfulness it can help to be able to visualise, when you are bringing in the awareness sitting with the emotions and thoughts try to think of what they look like to you personally.
It's so simple and so pure but it works.
You can imagine your emotions and thoughts in whatever way you like and tailor it to suit you.
How can Mindfulness help me?
Mindfulness is simple and easy to do once you have the intention to make the changes to the way you see and view yourself and the world around you.
Mindfulness applies a mixture of Key exercises and Skills that you can add to your tool box and coping strategies.
Here are some of the key Mindful exercises and skills :
- Meditations - you can find a meditation that suits you best without any pressure
- Breathing exercises to help you focus and centre yourself
- Exercises to re-centre and focus yourself so that you can deal with difficult life challenges that you can do anywhere
- Learning to manage your everyday life in a calm, compassionate, loving and accepting manner, without the fear of change, becoming more flexible
- Learning to listen to yourself and others and build stronger communication with compassion and love.
You can do it when you want you choose to, in your own time and without any time restraints or pressure.
It is a great way to focus your mind and body, reconnecting and treating yourself with compassion and Love.
If you feel like you would like to learn more about Mindfulness or want to take part every Monday there is a new feature called:
Mindful Monday
Over on the Aspergers Girl Guide Facebook Page, where every week there will be a new feature focusing specifically on different element of Mindfulness and how it can help you cope with the daily challenges you face and help you understand yourself in a loving and compassionate way.
I will also being doing posts on the blog as well to go more in depth about how Mindfulness can help you and talking about how it has helped me so far.
www.facebook.com/AspergersGirls
I hope to see you soon!
Sophie x
Comments
Post a Comment