Positive Mental Attitude

Recently I've been thinking about becoming more positive and trying not be negative. 

In the past I've allowed myself to be negative for no reason and pushing away opportunities through lack of confidence and not understanding my talents properly. 

For me it has been a struggle to get to the point where I feel confident enough to get myself into a world that I sometimes feel alienated from, but somehow i'm going to have to fit in. And this is where I thought about the knock on effects of negative emotions and thoughts. 

Changing my mental attitude is a hard process and something I have to think about and although i've began writing post it notes with positive messages about my body confidence, intelligence and even to the point of saying trust yourself and your gut! 

It seems strange and a little bit weird, but it helps to have a visualisation of what my attentions about myself are, it can help drive you to go for stuff that you wouldn't normally and being at home at the moment has driven me around the bend with boredom and it has left me anxious, exhausted and in the negative head space i'm trying not to be in. 

Whenever something happens that I react to in a negative way, it sets me back and I think it's my fault when really it's not. I'm waiting for all these opportunities and finding i'm not getting myself out there due to lack of confidence, self esteem issues and worrying about what people might think. 

This isn't just a problem that Aspergers people face, it happens to everybody. With anxiety it can seem like an endless cycle, always over thinking every little detail but in truth if you are good enough and confident people will see that radiate from you. 

I'm not writing this blog post to sound like I know everything, I have to still have support in many forms and like everyone I have down days or days where I think, What am I doing with my life? 

It's okay to feel self assured and confident, it doesn't make you cocky and neither will that hinder you and to be honest people find that attractive and interesting. 

Something that i've learn't from my experiences in the industry I love to work in is that being Aspergers doesn't mean you're automatically on the back foot, but in truth you're not. 

If you're considered that means that someone has thought about you in and thinks you can rather than can't. Anxiety is biggest issue for anyone dealing with it, like I said in my last blog if it manifests itself and you can see it in anyway you want to like a dark cloud with rain, or a person who is constantly whispering all those doubts in your ear you can deal with it and reason with it in your own time. 

I've found that talking to my anxiety and seeing it as a person or a being helps to overcome those doubts before they arise but in a positive way and say to it: 

"I understand you are scared and unsure but you need to trust me!" 

Trusting yourself is frightening, it can seem stupid or even selfish to say to yourself that you know whats best for you and as a young adult, I still don't understand what I need to do in my life adult things and situations still frighten me, inside I still want to be a teenager who has no worries in the world but in truth at some point we've all got to grow into adults. 

Everyone goes through that transition of not wanting to grow up because being a child is so much easier and we still want to latch onto that sense of no responsibilities and now this is beaten out of us earlier than ever these days that children are not allowed to be children anymore! 

Knowing what you want to do with your life and having the determination and confidence to do what you want to do without thinking about the negative what if's? 

Other people don't help, trust me... if you say I am going to do this, they one: might not understand what you want to do, two: are jealous or three: have their insecurities that they need to deal with but that isn't your problem and they shouldn't put that on you for a start but you need to do whats right for you at this particular time in your life, right now. 

You have the power to change anything you want with your life and it's up to you to do it - sorry for applying some pressure but seriously if you are stuck in a rut or feel like you've lost yourself in some way then make a positive board or even say one positive thing a day. 

I'm trying to do it and it is difficult especially when people instantly doubt your decisions or choices, you know what, if it's what you want go and do it don't throw in the towel because friends and family don't understand what you want to do!!! 

This is something I have to think about when people doubt my decisions, it makes me upset, it makes me think that i'm not doing the correct thing and in actual fact if I didn't feel that I was doing the right thing in my life I wouldn't be doing it. 

It's the same when it comes to relationships, you need to trust your instincts and Aspergers has this really awesome in built sensor that tells you when something doesn't feel right!!! 

Being positive is something that comes from within, and being strong and healthy and happy takes time but say that to yourself everyday. 

"I'm strong, I'm confident and I am healthy and happy with all the decisions I make in my life!" 

Thats something that will make you feel more confident and positive instantly! And it's something that you can do privately without anyone doubting you or making you feel like that you're doubting yourself! 

Being positive doesn't cost anything, really doesn't it's telling yourself what feels right for you and trusting and believing in yourself. i don't agree with these self help books, but I do agree with things like support and talking about any issues and getting them out in the open and especially if this isn't just a confidence issue that has manifested itself due to one experience but if it's starting to effect your life in a way where you feel depressed or worthless then it's time to talk it out with someone who can give you the tools with or without medication to deal with them. 

All i'm trying to say in a very lengthy way is that if this is the only one thing you do today for yourself is tell yourself a positive message!

And this isn't just a mental thing, treat your body right as well - love every part of yourself! If you love one bit of your body, and this might be a facial feature or your hair of whatever it can lead onto more things that you will notice in a positive light. 

Body confidence is a major issue in this day and age, to be honest women do pick at their imperfections and make them worse due to the fact that in society they might not be right. You are you for a reason and if your nose is too big or you hate the fact that your body is not normal well guess what someone will like you for who you are but you don't need to have surgery to change that! 

You need to love yourself from the outside and on the inside! 

Anyway I did this to make sure you guys knows that someone believes in you but also wants you to believe and love yourself!