The Most Awesome Day Ever!!

Some of you might not know that I was formally a media student.. and although my life has has it's downs over the past two years, 2016 is turning into an amazing year and we haven't even made it through a month yet! 

Today has been a dream come true for me as I have been to the BBC for a work experience interview after a long and difficult battle to even get through the doors of a media insitution as big as the BBC. 

It feels pretty damn awesome to know that you have been considered for something off your own merit after years of studying and doing work experience only to be told it isn't enough or you haven't got the right skill sets that they are looking for. 

To then have someone like this insitution to turn around and give you the green light to go ahead and actually be allowed into a work place and be given the opportunity to progress and learn unique insights and skills that will stand you in good stead for the rest of your life. 

Whatever your passion maybe there is always a route into it if you work at it and stay positive and as a Aspergers girl this is more about self belief and recognising that although you are technically disabled in some way and people may not understand you, if you are good enough and know what you are doing then it'll all work out in the end but you need to be driven as well. 

The route into the media industry is very unique with experience more likely to land you presenting jobs where as a Acedemic (College &University) is more likely to get you production based behind the scemnes experience but no matter what the outcome if the opportunities are there take them and never let go. 

I did have a wobble this morning and doubted whether or not i'd be good enough and now find myself over analysing every detail as being Aspie what can we do but think constantly.

The annoying thing was my wobble was about my self worth, I'd forgotten how hard i'd worked to get this far and wanted to throw in the towel before i'd even got to Media City UK which is like a second home to me in a way. 

I spent three long years studying there and did visithe building I was interviewed in today and have met BBC professionals and have had the confidence to introduce myself and ask questions that are important. 

abut I always have that niggle at the back of my head, that voice that tells me that i'm not good enough and instead of telling it to go away and leave me alone it rose it's ugly head the humiliating thing about it is these demons are from a place that i'd finally left behind. 

School is the reason I doubt myself when amazing opportunities come my way which like everyone else I rightly deserve as I've worked hard to get where I am now without feeling like a failure every five minutes. I actually gave myself a little kick up the backside and thought to myself:

    "If i'm really that S@*t then would they have selected me from how many applicants today?"

I can't let the people who bullied me to win whether or not they did or didn't mean to say the things they said! 

Self belief is extremely difficult and takes a long time to get back into yourself, but trust me guys when I say of you love something so much you want it to be your job ..... just bloody go for it!!!

Positivity, self confidence and awareness and more importanly you deserve it like everyone else and don't let your Aspergers or others stand in your way. 

I haven't been told whether or not i'm on the placement yet but i'll make sure i let you know in 2 to 3 weeks time!! 

Night guys xxx