#SurvivalGuideSpecial: Dealing with Nasty Neighbours and Knowing Your Rights As An Aspergers Person



We all have one of those Neighbours who can make life hell, hey there is even TV programmes about the subject these days but as someone with Aspergers when does the odd confrontation become something more than that? 

Having experienced this for the last 15 years of my life with constant runs in and being threatened on a numerous occasions when does it become more than Harassment and turns into a Hate Crime? 

Under UK law a Hate Crime against a Disabled Person is classed as the following :
  •  Threatening behaviour
  • Assault
  • Robbery 
  • Damage to Property
  • Inciting others to commit a Hate Crime
  • Harassment
If any of the above has happened to you then it is defined as a Hate Crime against a Disabled person. 

"As someone with Aspergers Syndrome I don't see myself or even class myself as Disabled and this is not because I don't believe I am Autistic but rather I don't see myself as less abled as a Normal Person but rather Differently Abled instead."

But when it comes to neighbours who insist on threatening my Mother, Cat and even trying to damage our property which incidentally happened on sunday where a neighbour tried to deflate our tyres on our car because we refused to move it as we were going out in a matter of five minutes and they were to impatient to wait! 

What could I do? 

Now I knew that under the law I was protected but whether the police would do anything was a different matter. I have had neighbours who lived next door that were a constant cause of concern to the point where we called the police on over 30 different occasions.

When Police arrived and we explained the situation we were told that they would go round and have a word with them and log the complaint in the system. The only problem was even when mentioned to the officers that I had Autism and that the behaviour of our neighbours was actually classed as a hate crime they did not do anything about my complaint or take it further to their Superiors!

So now I don't trust the police force at all, as they have not done anything and also I don't think they like being called out to domestic complaints. 



As Autistic people, we are already used to many forms of discrimination everyday in different aspects of our lives. 

But when it comes to our protection and where we live which is our comfort zone where we can be free without prejudice or judgement from others is it right for us to be harassed in our own homes?  

The  answer is no!!! 

Knowing your rights and the law is your best weapon against the abuse you might face, but to prove your case to the police is a different matter all together. As life goes you have to do all the hard work yourself and collate the evidence before presenting your case or even making a complaint.

I know it seems ridiculous in this day and age but with budget cuts to police forces and even to you as a disabled person the best thing for you to do when you face this situation is to be calm and in control. 

My Top Tips: 

1) Do Not Rise To The Abuse: 
This is the most important thing to consider, you need to keep calm and just breath and keep your anxiety and anger at bay. Focus on your breathing and try to stay relaxed maybe even use some form of coping strategy to block them out like your MP3 Player. You don't have to say anything to them or even engage in the conversation or give eye contact. Usually if you don't retaliate they will get bored and give up. This depends on the situation or the person involved, if you feel like you are in danger always have your phone on you or even two (So your House Phone and Mobile) so that you can ring the police. 

2) Record any Verbal or Physical Altercations on your Mobile Phone: 
I have said this before in a different post but it is very important if you don't have CCTV. Using your phone as a discreet way of gathering evidence. You don't need to tell them that they are being recorded or even speak to them at all but cataloguing the altercations and abuse can be your best way of proving your case. Also write everything down and time and date the altercations. If you feel like you're not confident to do this then just automatically call the police to come and assist you. 

3) Know your Rights: 
Like I stated above, if your know your rights under the law, you are covered and able to make a complaint that has to be listened to!! If the police don't know the exact nature of the crime being committed ask to speak to someone higher up in the force. When it comes to your safety you need to feel and know that you're protected. You also need to inform the police that you are Autistic and therefore disabled. Even if you hate calling yourself disabled!!! 

4) If you feel like you are going to meltdown, WALK AWAY!: 
Everyone is different when they meltdown. Some of us just start to cry and sob and others get angry and turn violent quickly. If you feel like you are going to melt down and cannot control your outburst then it's time to come inside and report the crime itself to the police. 
Either ring them and tell them to come quickly, explain you are distressed and have Autism. 
UK READERS:
You can report a hate crime via the Direct Gov website which I'll post the link to at the end of this post!!! 
If you react to the abuse and cause yourself and others harm they can report you to the police. 

5) Seek Advice and Help from your Local Citizens Advice Centre if confused: 
Citizen's Advice are there to help you on all matters from Benefits, Work Problems, Housing and also Legal matters. They will direct you to the right department and authorities to help you with your problems. They are a free service as well so you can look them up online or ring them. 

6) You are NOT ALONE!!! 
Never think that you are alone and that you will never be able to leave your house again. If you need to talk to someone there are plenty of helplines open 24 hours a day to speak to you and more importantly listen to you. 
If you live near family members/friends/carer please ring them and tell them what is going on!! Sometimes you can't fight this on your own and more importantly you shouldn't have to! 

I hope that is post helps and I also hope that none of my readers ever have this experience with anyone whether they are neighbours or not!
Hate Crimes are serious and you shouldn't feel like you are going to waste anyones time!!!

More Information: 

https://www.gov.uk/report-hate-crime

http://www.autism.org.uk/

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/resources-and-tools/navigation-tools/Search/?q=hate+crimes

http://www.samaritans.org/










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