#SurvivalGuide - Personal Identity and High School


Knowing who you are as a person can be difficult but in a world where fitting into a group or box is the most important thing ever! How do you cope if you don't fit in? 

I know what it feels like to be a 'square peg in a round hole' girl. It's something that I hated in my teenage years. 

But now as a 23 year old, i've learn't to embrace and love my personality and who I am as a person. It's not easy and certainly scary to not know who you are as a person when you're supposed to be able to find a group of friends and fit into their clique and then box yourself and live like that for the next five to seven years of your life. 

It seems so silly, but when in High School, it is important to be able to label yourself immediately! And whatever label you end up with in year 7 can effect you for the rest of your days whilst at school. 

When I was at school I was at the bottom of the pile. 


I was in fact a very depressed kid who was suffering from anxiety attacks and depression almost every day and to take away the pain and the torment I did used to listen to a lot of rock music and was then labeled from then on an EMO! 

Now I think the label of EMO can be classed as a beautiful on. As from experience I know how soulful and poetic these teens can be. Emotional Goths in recent years have had a bad press due to links with suicide cults and other things that the press think are strange. 

But with all the beauty of  the Emo scene in school, you're not the popular kid for being and social outcast who listens to My Chemical Romance, Panic at the Disco and other bands. 

Being Popular is not the best thing in the world. 

The stereotype of being popular comes from Teen Movies and yes i'm sorry but I hate them! 

Every girl is expected to look like a barbie doll, wear pink, dyed/natural blonde hair and be completely vain, up themselves and Stupid! 
There is also an expectation that by year 9 you have to have a boyfriend with social standing such as captain of the football team (Soccer for my American readers) or a really cool guy who knows the team captain of the football team. 

So unless High School has suddenly morphed into the set of Mean Girls on a Daily basis rather than a place when you go to learn?

The confusion about who or what you are can drive you insane!

Being individual can be your social downfall and send you down that social ladder in a second. In true fact it doesn't matter who you are or what you are labelled. It's all about being comfortable in your own skin! 

Being comfortable in your own skin does not happen over night and does require looking in the mirror and saying to yourself: 

"I am Myself, I am a Great, Wonderful Person." 

Being negative about yourself is not the right way to go as on personal experience believing all those thoughts and what some group of people tell you is going to end up in depression and self hatred. 

Being comfortable in who you are is knowing that whatever you feel or see in yourself is YOU! 

It is not socially dictated by someone else, you have not been manipulated to be someone you are not.  

As a teenager with everything else that is going on in your body and mind, trying to just control one aspect of your life can help. 

Personal identity is a work in progress and as you grow older, self awareness and identity comes to you easier. I know now that I'm in my twenties I feel more comfortable with who I am and like the fact that when people meet me they see hopefully who I see everyday in the mirror. 

Don't feel downhearted or it's the end of the world when you don't fit in. 

The advantage of being you is that you don't have to conform. 


Aspergers girls don't generally fit in and that can be seen to be a bad thing. But in fact knowing that you are individual can help you grow into a better, well rounded person in the future and accepting your Aspergers can be the first step in knowing who you are. 

This acceptance won't go down well in the social ladder of High School, but honestly who wants to be the popular kid? 

The Pressures of maintaining the appearance of constantly being perfect is not the most fun thing in the world. If you're under the radar at least you can focus on more important things. 

Like Studying and learning the information you need to get out of the hell hole of High School and move on up to Six Form or College! 

I hope this has all made sense and helped? 







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