Stuck in Limbo

The Ironic thing about getting and even passing a degree when you have Aspergers is that like the rest of your graduate friends, getting into the work place isn't as easy as it is believed.

With AS it becomes more and more complicated and although I have 2 blogs on the go and a radio show (may it be Volunteering or Not) the help to get into the work place or to set up your own business can be tough without help and support.  But when you try to get that help and support in the form of an organisation set up and given funding by the local authority to help autistic children and young adults to gain help so that they can further their lives. So why is it that when I try and access this help there is nothing to show for it?

As a person who was diagnosed later on in their teens, the help and support I should've received was not really available and when I heard that the charity was taking on adults I (looking back) took a gamble and decided to try and take on the help. But I feel like I am stuck in Limbo right now, I've asked for them to get in touch with another organisation to get me funding to start up my own business so that I can stop relying on the bank of Mum and start relying on myself for a change, which I want to do.

I sometimes feel like I'm being taken for a ride and that I am treated and I hate to say this like I haven't got one brain cell in my head. But the thing is I have studied at a Degree Level and try to socialise with non Autistic people and also to my downfall I act like I'm not AS but that is something that I have learn't to do, masking my actual autism helps in some situations as I'm still at the stage where I don't want to accept it- although I should but I don't really want it to define me as a person which I sometimes think they want me to do.
I think when people work with autistic people they see them all the same, and don't see them as an individual, and being treated like an individual is something that everyone has the right to. I feel everytime I go that they see me as an idiot rather than me, and I will not be defined by the norm.

I need help and I need something to take me forward and I'm not going to wait forever!

Sophie xxx

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