Relationships and AS = Complicated

I know that this is a pressing issue, having any type of relationship and AS can be difficult. 

Whether it's a sexual relationship or a friendship. Being naturally unsociable and  Awkward can be a pain. 

Knowing that also trust issues surrounding new people can be something of a challenge how do we start a relationship wothout messing it up? 

In my experience usually we know who we want to be friends with, whether we have things in common or not. I know that in the beginning I mask who I really am and pretend to be normal, which is a stupid thing to do as that isn't a true reflection of you as a whole person. Beig Aspergers is complicated enough as it is but throw in other human beings intp the equation and becomes more difficult. 

I do have some great friends that I knew from primary school and who helpped me become more outgoing and social and accept my Aspergers and just let me be me. 

 But actually going into a social situation and meeting bew people can be our worst nightmare so how do you cope? 

Take a deep breath: 

It's a silly thing to say, but taking a deep breath and trying to relax your body is the first thing that will help you calm yourself down. 

If someone comes up to you at school, college or university and engages in a conversation, see if you can  hold that conversation. It doesn't matter if you can't and your eye contact slips, just take another breath and continue. If you don't like the way the conversation is going say a polite goodbye and move on. You're not in the wrong. 

 *note* 

If a person on the street comes up to you and seems strange don't engage, just keep your head down and ignore them. 

ONLINE CAN BE A MINEFIELD: 

Facebook and other social media websites are brilliant for bringing people with the same interests as you together, to chat and talk about anything or anything. I had this experience when I joined my favourite bands website and met some of my best friends who happen to come from different countries. But there are dangers to the internet as anyone can make a false profile and be somebody who they are not. 

If you use Facebook, make sure

you set your privacy settings to only friends or you can see your personal information. Also make sure that the people that you are adding know you directly. If you don't know who the people are who have sent you a friend request ignore and decline the person.  Doing this they can not see your profile or your personal and private information. 

The same goes for MSN, BBM and My Space and other social networking sights. 

When it comes to having a boyfriend or girlfriend it can be different. AS girls can have relationships but we need our other halves to have some understandig and paitence when it comes to us. 

I have had bad form in relationships as at the time I was still adjusting to my diagnosis. My boyfriend went through kinda everything from seeing me at my highs and my lows. And he used to see the bad side of me. The thing is we are still friends and the only reason I felt comfortable with him was that I've known him since I was a kid.  But meeting someone new can be hard or telling someone you like them. I don't know if I can give any advice as I am still struggling on the sexual relationship front ... me and my ex never had sex by the way. 

Whatever it is, I feel like being someone's friend can be the best thing in the world although it is hard work to keep up. 

Anyway i'm off to bed ... so night night guys!!! 

Sophie xxx